Older Today's thought 26September00 If the sky wasn't so cloudy wouldn't it be a sunny day! 25September00 If women are so infallible, why isn't one allowed to be Pope? 24September00 A democracy is where elected representatives make decisions against the will of the majority of the people. 23September00 24 hours is normally sufficient time for your greatest worry to be of no substance. 22September00 I'm sure I had deja vu before. 21September2000 Tell a child she is clever and she will be. Tell a child she is good and she will be. Tell a child he is naughty and he will be! 20September00 When did you last tell each of your family that you loved them? 19September00 A lie is a problem waiting to be discovered. 18September00 Those who spend four years training for the Olympics are doing it for themselves and not for their country. 17September00 Sometimes what you give up to gain something is worth more than your achievement. 16September00 Do what you believe is the right thing and not the most popular. 15September00 Make every effort to be yourself in life - no-one else can be! 14September00 The frailties of capitalism and democracy are exposed by a petrol shortage of less than one week's duration. 13September00 First rule of politics: Never make promises to the electorate that they can remember. (Tony Blair promises the fuel crisis will be solved within 24 hours - it isn't!) 12September00 People are greedy and stupid when they get involved in a shortage and take much more than can use, thus preventing someone with a greater need from having anything. 11September00 People will believe anything. The way to create a shortage is to say something is in short supply. (petrol crisis in UK!) 10September00 The trouble with being philosophical about life is that it is a hard word to spell. 9September00 The secret of being happy and not being disappointed with life is to set your objectives really low! 8September00 If every setback is an opportunity, then most of us must have missed loads of opportunities. 7September00 Throughout our married life, my poor wife has suffered from sinus trouble; its been "sign us this cheque, sign us that cheque....." 6September00 I used to be forgetful, but now I don't remember if I am or not! 5September2000 Whether you think "the company" is the balance sheet, the profit and loss, the directors, or the employees, tells me a lot about you as a person. 4September2000 When I was a teenager, sex was what the coalman delivered coal in. 3September00 A woman considers how much she is saving, whereas a man reviews how much he is spending. 2September00 If you have to use two hands to count your true friends you are indeed lucky. 1September00 Most people's dogs have got a better chance of knowing the computer password than any hacker! 31August00 Instinct is often a better judge than logic. 30August00 It's knowing when to give up that makes you a winner. 29August00 In a time when communications have never been better, why is conversation almost a lost art? 28August00 Those good old days were only good because you were young. 27August00 Jessica (aged 4): "One day I'll fly in an aeroplane." Penny: "Pardon, what did you say?" Jessica: "I was only thinking to myself." 26August00 Hindsight is something others have, whereas you knew it wouldn't work at the time. 25August00 The only excusable mistakes are the ones you make yourself. 24August00 There is no greater pleasure than proving someone else wrong. 23August00 I've told my daughter a million times not to exaggerate. 22August00 Real hurt is being ignored. 21August00 At 50 you can only look forward to grandchildren and death - not necessarily in that order! 20August00 Nostalgia ain't what it used to be either! 19August00 The older I get, the better I was. 18August00 If the Law is always right, why do we need to employ a Parliament of more than 600 MP's to keep changing it? 17August00 If sex appeal is hereditary, does that explain what Tom Jones has in his jeans? 16August00 Whoever said, "There's no such thing as a free meal" never met my children. 15August00 OK, so how many famous inventors were born in the USA? The answer is none, all famous inventors were only babies when they were born. 14August00 If Isaac Newton hadn't invented gravity, would we all now be falling off the planet? 13August00 If Isaac Newton had been sitting underneath a coconut tree, would he have broken his skull and never invented gravity? 12August00 The young may not be perfect, but they have more time to improve on things than the old. 11August00 Death is something that only happens to other people.   Go to Previous Today's Thoughts